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Sure, you're up to date on the details of the Kobe Bryant case. And you know that the World Series is deadlocked and that Yankees coach Don Zimmer has a tendency to wildly charge the mound headfirst, as if a bowling ball got loose on lane 3.
But are you really up to date on the important sports news? Here are a few essential items that may have fallen through the cracks.
Anton Van De Venter, 27, of South Africa, broke the high-altitude record in the sport of extreme ironing in August, ironing his national flag at the 20,000-foot summit of Mount Kilimanjaro, while nude, in freezing temperatures.
In March, British diver Ian Mitchell sawed through ice in Wisconsin and submitted photos of himself in a wet suit ironing a shirt that was braced against the underside of the ice. Inga Kosak had won the first World Extreme Ironing Championship in Munich in September, based on running a course that included running up trees and through streams and ironing a designated garment.
In Bulgaria, a former world chess champion became the first player to be disqualified at a major event when his cell phone rang during a game, according to the London Daily Telegraph. Ruslan Ponomariov's phone went off during the Ukraine-Sweden match at the European Team Championships in Plovdiv. And you just know it was one of those annoying, novelty rings.
Ponomariov protested and refused to sign the scoresheet, saying that he still had plenty of "anytime minutes."
Meanwhile, Germany's stranglehold on elephant polo continued unabated, as the Germans defeated Scotland in the World Cup final. The Scottish Chivas Regal squad was defeated 5-3 by Germany's Mercedes Benz Thailand team in the final of the King's Cup Elephant Polo competition in Hua Hin, Thailand.
It was the second year in a row that Germany has beaten Scotland in the final, and this year Scotland was the No. 1 seed.
"There was a massive tropical storm about 30 minutes before the game began," Scotland captain Peter Prentice said. "The sky went black and for half an hour it just rained cats and dogs. It was a quagmire and as a result the ball slowed right down. On occasions the elephants just stamped the ball into the ground."
There's just nothing that frosts this column more than a downpour prior to an important elephant polo match. Scotland is, of course, the Boston Red Sox of elephant polo - there's some sort of curse involved, but the story is already strange enough so let's drop it.
I've been getting many letters concerning the annual Black Pudding Throwing Championships, so here's the latest news on that front: The annual event has been saved after the tournament came under threat following the closure of its venue. The competition, which last year attracted contestants from as far away as Australia, has been held in Lancashire, England for more than 150 years.
Black pudding is generally described as a regional delicacy consisting of cooked pigs' blood, fat and rusk, encased in a length of intestine.
The aim of the annual tournament is for each competitor to try and knock some Yorkshire puddings off a wooden platform 20 feet up the pub wall with three throws of a black pudding. And you've been wasting your time playing catch with your kid with a baseball and glove.
The Royal Oak pub in the village of Ramsbottom, near Bury, has now stepped forward to play host to the event. No, no, please hold your cheers and applause until all of the items have been listed.
In Pinson, Ala., Joseph Logan, 46, was arrested for assault just after watching Alabama's televised 34-31 football loss to Arkansas. According to the Birmingham News, Mr. Logan started ranting, slamming doors, and throwing dishes into the sink, and it was at this point that his son, Seth, 20, chose to ask him if he would help him buy a car, at which point Logan grabbed a gun, put Seth in a headlock, and fired a bullet near Seth's ear.
"I know we take football serious in the South," said a sheriff's deputy, "but that's crossing the line."
- Rick Chandler's interactive sports column, Capacity Crowd, can be found at NBCSports.com. Contact him at RickChand@earthlink.net
