Lakeside’s Night of Sacrifice could bring more snow
The Norse god of winter is having a party Saturday, Dec. 11 at the Lakeside Inn and Casino.
A Night of Sacrifice to Ullr will include movies, raffle prizes, music by Lake Tahoe DJ and food and drink specials. People are encouraged to donate unwrapped toys – or “gifts to the grommets” – which will be given to Christmas Cheer.
Event organizer Ryan Palmer arranged a question-and-answer session with Ullr. Here are excerpts from that conversation:
Action: Whistler, B.C. is getting crazy snow. Is that because of the upcoming Olympics?
Ullr: I’ve been there putting some time in bringing in winter conditions to prepare for the festivities of the mortals’ competition.
Action: What is your favorite Olympic sport?
Ullr: I like the ski biathlon because I dominate, for I am Ullr, Norse god of winter, and I came to bring the pain.
Action: Yeah, we got that.
Ullr: You sure you got it, silly gentile? I will be descending upon the Lake Tahoe Basin all week, but especially on Friday, Dec. 11, Lakeside Inn and Casino in the Tavern downstairs, ask for Ron. He makes a helluva Rumplemintz.
Action: So you like a warm drink?
Ullr: Do reindeer turds stink?
Action: What do you think of artificial snow?
Ullr: I don’t discourage the use of artificial snow because we need it due to the effects of global warming. If people are a little more green friendly, Ullr will be more cooperative with his winter bounty. Ullr can’t make snow when it’s 32 degrees like modern machinery can.
Action: Why do you speak in the third person?
Ullr: Ullr does not refer to himself in the third person. Ullr is tired of your foolish questions.
Action: Why are you so cold?
Ullr: Because I’m from Norway, stupid!
Action: What is your favorite form of transportation?
Ullr: Ullr prefers to snowskate as his preferred mode of shred.
Action: You have the vernacular of a snowboarder.
Ullr: Correct. I spent the last couple of summers in California. Ullr’s been hookin’ up with El Nino in Palm Desert so this should be a good winter.
Action: Will there be snow bunnies at the Night of Sacrifice?
Ullr: Yes, the girls of Girl Powder will be here to appease Ullr.
Action: Will they all be there just for you?
Ullr: My sleigh is quite large, but I am sure there will be vixens for everyone. And we will have some local films by First Track productions as well as local snow skate snowboard films, raffle prizes, drink and food specials. If you’d like to make an offering, please bring an unwrapped gift and Ullr will deliver it to Christmas Cheer.
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