Ask Tessie: What March brackets would you like to see in Tahoe?
With the college basketball tournament, every March we are inundated with every kind of bracket imaginable. What bracket would you like to see for Tahoe?
Can We Put The Game On?
One of the reasons I’ve stuck around so long and haven’t transplanted to a place with less unqualified and inebriated boaters, like Crater Lake, is because of Lake Tahoe’s proximity to gambling.
I like to bet on everything. And I mean everything. Sports. Oscar winners. Street fights. If Olympic skaters will fall during the biggest performance of their life. When Grandma will die.
There are a lot of different groups that I would love to see duke it out in Tahoe.
How about a bracket that pits the biggest complainers in Tahoe against each other? Put two bellyachers in a room and see who can go on the longest rant without running out of steam. First round: Guy Complaining About Vindictive Snowplow Drivers vs. Women Who Didn’t Get Locals’ Discount. The winning whiner faces up against victor of Vacation Home Rentals Are Ruining My Life vs. Road Rager Who Hates Slow Drivers.
What about a bracket of the biggest Jerry on the mountain? Guy Skiing in Jeans vs. Woman Riding With Cat in Carrier. Next up, Snowboarder Who Gets Backpack Stuck On Chairlift vs. Lady Who Catapults Into Ski Rack, followed by Dude Wearing Goggles Upside Down vs. Chick Riding Bunny Hill With GoPro. (By the way, if you’re not following @jerryoftheday on Instagram, you’re missing out.)
Finally, I’d like to see a bracket featuring the best beers in Tahoe. There’s like 45 breweries on the South Shore alone these days, and I want to know which one is cranking out the best suds.
Luckily for you this bracket is actually coming to life in the form of a Best of Tahoe Craft Beer Contest hosted by none other than me (OK fine, it’s the Tribune, but we all know I’m the most important employee there) and Lake Tahoe AleWorX this May.
Tickets are on sale now, so buy one so you can drink copious amounts of craft beer and pretend like you can tell the difference between them when all you really want to do is slam a can of Hamm’s.
Be there, or be lame.
Tahoe Tessie is a humorous take on the standard advice column. It is produced by the Tribune staff, and it is not meant to be taken literally. Have a question you want to ask Tessie? Send it to firstname.lastname@example.org.