Tahoe boy’s death far-reaching in community
Last Tuesday, South Shore resident Marie Logie lived her worst nightmare as she sat holding her convulsing son on the bathroom floor.
Just minutes after his last weekly drum lesson, 10-year-old Joshua Logie’s life was suddenly cut short when he complained of a headache and then collapsed when an artery in his brain ruptured.
Cradling her son in her lap and the phone in her hand, Marie Logie said she could never have imagined her healthy, happy son lying lifeless in her arms.
Joshua was taken to Barton Memorial Hospital just after 7 p.m., and life-flighted to the University of California Davis an hour later. Logie said UC Davis doctors grieved with her as they pronounced Joshua brain dead around 5 p.m., the next day.
Although Joshua had to be transported to the airport because Barton’s helipad closed just three weeks ago, Logie said doctors told her he only could have survived if he was on the operating table when the artery hemorrhaged.
Angered and shocked because there were no warning signs of her son’s sudden death, Logie said her role as parent took on a whole new meaning in the days that followed.
“When I was at the hospital I wanted to grab every parent that I saw in the hall or anywhere and just say, ‘Do you know how lucky you are you have something to hold onto?’ I don’t have anything to hold onto. It’s gone,” she said.
Just shy of his 11th birthday, Logie remembers the joy her son brought to this world as she tries to muffle the deafening pain that accompanied the realization of her life without him.
“I think my skin just absorbs them now,” she said of the tears that streamed down her face. “My favorite title was, ‘Hello my name is Marie and I’m Josh’s mom.’ “
As her only child, Joshua was her best friend and gave her a purpose in life.
“There wasn’t anything that we didn’t talk about. There wasn’t anything we wanted to do that we didn’t do,” Logie said. “I never thought when I had a kid that he would mean so much to me.”
Logie’s sentiments were echoed in Joshua’s fifth-grade teacher, Eliana Morris’ comments on her young pupil.
“I think overall I feel intense gratitude that I had Joshua for 2 1/2 months,” Morris said. “He was just a brilliant, beautiful person.”
Morris said Joshua’s Tahoe Valley Elementary School classmates especially feel his loss but have counseling available to them to handle their grief.
“I think the students and I are left with his smile,” Morris said. “We’re just reminded of Josh every day and the kids are really appreciating that. We’re just kind of carrying the thing Josh reminded us of – the value of life.”
Almost as if Logie and her son were somehow conscious of their short time together, Logie said they never wasted a single minute.
“We never went to bed at night without saying good night, sweet dreams and I love you,” she said. “I always felt like I wasn’t going to live to be a ripe old age, so I tried to make sure that every minute I had with Joshua counted and that we didn’t leave anything important unfinished.”
Logie said she has no regrets of her life with her son, except for the fact she wasn’t given more time with him.
“I don’t think enough parents realize how fragile (life) is,” Logie said. “I have absolutely no regrets, I wish everybody were to feel that way if they were to lose their child. I want to ask parents, ‘Would you have a regret if you walked in and found your child lying on the floor? How many regrets would you have?’ The only thing I want is just more time.”
Logie said her son was hoping to be a marine biologist one day, and said he loved spending time in his dad’s boat sailing around Lake Tahoe and snowboarding down the slopes of Sierra-at-Tahoe.
Joshua’s biggest love was music, which is why Logie said she is setting up a memorial fund in his honor to finance increased musical education at the elementary schools.
“Josh really loved music and he wouldn’t have missed one of (his drum) lessons for anything. So in a way it’s kind of neat that he got to have that last one,” Logie said. “If nothing else, the two things I would really like to see happen is that the music scholarship really gets off the ground so we can really help kids. And the other thing would be that parents take a second look at their kids and realize how important they are and how fragile, and to make sure they have a good life.”
Logie said she has to take life day to day now, but said she has been comforted by the caring medical help her son received and the friendly people at the Ronald McDonald house where she stayed in Sacramento. She said phone calls from people who have lost children have also been a big help as she remembers just how sweet and intuitive her son was. One particular story, Logie said rings eerily true.
“One time when he was really little, it was cute I’ll never forget it, he looked up at me and said, ‘Mommy, you’re the best mommy I never had.’
“And I looked at him and he just had this love on his face and I said, ‘Well Josh you’re the best kid I’ve never had.’ And that keeps ringing in my ears about how true that is because I never really had him,” she said. “He was just here for a short time and was a little blessing.”
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